10 Ways People Stylishly Sleep During Sermon But Pretend They Are Not

The rate at which people sleep off in churches is quite alarming, according to my observations, people barely sleep off during praise and worship, but during sermon, it is a different thing entire

Funny enough, many of those who usually sleep off in church barely sleep off when they find themselves at club house, beer palour, Night of a thousand Laugh, etc; but when in the house of God, na sleep sure pass

Before I became born again, these are the tactics we normally use to deceive the pastors and ushers that we were not sleeping, when in fact, we were :P

Now let's discuss 10 ways people stylishly sleep off in the church but pretend they are not

1. They Bend Their Heads As If They Are Praying

During long prayers, when they become tired or feeling sleepy, they will sit down, bend their heads and will start shaking it like agama lizard. This is to deceive the congregation and the ushers that they are praying profusely, when in fact, they are sleeping.

2. They Wear Goggles

Na dis one common pass among youths. When they want to sleep, they will wear their goggles (usual black shades) and focus on the preacher as if they are so much interested in the sermon. This is just to deceive the congregation and the pastor himself that they are feeling his sermon. The only way you will know that they are actually sleeping, is when the preacher asks the congregation to prophesy into the life of the person sitting next to them :D

3. They Unnecessarily Focus On The Bible

Just because they know that the ushers will prevent them from sleeping, they will open their Bible to a random chapter and focus on it as if they are going along with the sermon. However, they will bend their heads and off they sleep. They sleep under the pretence of reading the Holy Bible.

4. They Nod Their Heads By Intervals

Some of them are very smart and tactical when sleeping. They keep shaking their heads like agama lizard to every word the preacher is saying. Not like they are listening, but they just want to avoid the usher's disturbances. They will quickly take a nap and will quickly return to a conscious state before the ushers come to their direction.

5. They Lie On The Floor

This is not an exaggeration. This sometimes happen during vigil. I have occasionally witnessed when some codedly slept off by lying on the floor just to deceive the congregation that they are sorrowful for their sins and they want God to forgive them. From dia, dem go divert go sleep :D

6. They Fold Their Arms

Some will fold their arms in disguise, then rest their back on their chairs and off they sleep

7. They Go On Their Knees

Some of them will go on their knees, rest their heads on the chair and they will sleep off. Funny enough, they are so calculative that they will wake up immediately the prayer ends

8. They Sleep And Still Lie That They Are Not

Even though it is obvious they are sleeping, they will still pretend they are not. If any usher taps them on the shoulder, they will deceive the usher by start speaking in tongues like they have been praying in spirit. Na dis one I dey do pass when I been dey inside the world :D


9. They Hide At The Back Rows

Even though these ones come to church without the intention of sleeping; consciously or unconsciously, they will still sleep off. Just because they are not sure of themselves, dem
go kuku sit down for back seat in case sleep show face, nobody go fit notice dem for back seat


10. Feel free to add the last one


Happy Sunday fellas


Thanks for reading

Have fun

Originally written by: Tosyne2much